Au Pair

Having an au pair is great.

Almost immediately, I could breathe.
There is another adult human to absorb the child energy. It feels like this massive shift. Someone can wash the dishes and  someone else can bath the kids at the same time!

She's lovely. It isn't the friendly relationship that I was a little worried about. It's a backpacker who has a comfortable and free place to stay, in exchange for a bit of help around the home and babysitting money. It's a nice, pleasant exchange.

The flexibility of being able to take one to a doctor appointment or jump out to the shops on my own has been such a relief. And, surprisingly, the ability to run again has really helped my mental state.

It still feels like a bit of limbo in life.
I had the epiphany while writing Christmas cards a couple weeks ago. I'm busy. Life is busy.
But the business is boring. I'm bored. It feels so meaningless.

I haven't felt meaningful in a long time. Despite having two kids and all the fixings in a safe, comfortable home, I want to be excited by my surroundings again.

So now I need to work out how to do that.